Thursday, August 18, 2016

I Decided to Be Confident + Happy + Healthy

We've all heard it before...
"It took nine months to make the baby, it takes nine months to lose the baby weight."

That's right, I'm saying it.
That's a bunch of crap.
That's the last thing a women wants to hear with all her postpartum hormones rushing through her body. You just are going to be fat for the next nine months, so deal with it. 
That's what it sounds like to me.
Heck, by the time I got to six months postpartum (when I couldn't really use the excuse of postpartum hormones), it still upset me to hear that. Although there may be some truth behind it, it's not something you want to hear when your baby is eight months old, and you still got 13 pounds to go to reach pre-baby weight (which wasn't even an ideal weight to begin with I might add!). What happens when your baby is nine months old, ten months, eleven months old, A YEAR OLD, and the "baby weight" is still holding onto those hips? (In my case,thighs, arms, belly, hips, face, etc.)
What do people say then?
The excuse of "you just had a baby" couldn't be used anymore, and I started to feel really defeated.
Before, I dig into this a little more, let me just preface this by saying...
My baby has brought more happiness and joy to my life than I ever dreamed possible.
She has been difficult, she has been tough, but she has made all of the hardships completely worth the loss of sleep and stress of having a wee one.
My body image wasn't important for awhile.
After all, my body did grow this little miracle.
I honestly still can't believe it to this day.
There comes a time, when you finally feel like you're getting back to your old self, you feel comfortable with this parenting business, and you decide to put on jeans instead of yoga pants.
The only problem with that for me jeans still didn't fit.
I was still wearing maternity clothes, and I had a hard time investing in new clothes that were double the size of what I used to buy. 
I kinda was in denial.
By the summer, I knew I had time to take my health a little more serious.
I began exercising again, 4-5 times a week and eating "healthy" so I thought.
(Lets face it - eating healthy Monday-Friday afternoon. Eating whatever I wanted Friday night - Sunday, because you know, that's what I could do pre-baby and it was all fine
It got to the point, where I was starting to feel defeated and unhappy with my lack of progress. Bathing suit shopping for our vacation really put things into perspective for me. What I thought I looked like, was a lot different than reality. Part of me was complacent with how I looked, but the majority of me was really disappointed that the weight hadn't just started falling off like everyone told me it would. 
I was working out, eating healthy majority of the week, and I was getting no where.
I would look at Harper, and hope that she didn't face these same poor body image issues that I have the majority of my life. I promised myself that as soon as she got here, I would always be positive about my body, so she had a positive role model to look up to. But I was failing her, and I was failing myself. I wasn't being positive. I wasn't treating my body with respect, I wasn't taking care of myself.
She deserves a mom that is healthy, energized, and happy.
And I deserve that for myself.
After being motivated by my sweet neighbor Lindsay-Ann, I took a leap of faith into the program that seemed entirely too complicated and entirely too difficult. I was desperate by the end of the summer, but I was ready to try anything.
Enter - 21 Day Fix.
*angels begin singing*

I watched Lindsay-Ann make so much amazing progress over the last few months, and she wasn't even doing anything that crazy! Working out 30 minutes a day, eating delicious food, and drinking some delicious chocolate milkshakes (now I refer to her delicious milkshakes properly... Shakeology). It was definitely something I could do. After talking with my husband, he supported me 100%. He even said he wondered why I hadn't tried it sooner, since he knew I was trying so hard over the summer.
After one round of 21 Day Fix, I can honestly say I've never felt healthier, never felt more proud of myself, and never felt happier. I didn't lose a miraculous amount of weight my first round, but I more importantly, I found a program that I can stick to, that won't make me feel like I'm missing out. This program has opened my eyes to the possibilities.
Instead of feeling unhappy, insecure, and unhealthy.
I'm choosing to be confident, happy, and healthy.

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